In the short term, when we experience a painful episode, it feels like the end of the world. We ought to know that in the long run, matters get normalised if we give it a chance without unnecessarily meddling and aggravating the situation. Going ballistic over episodic matters is uncalled for. Unfortunately, it is the default mode that must be addressed promptly to curb knee-jerk thinking. Mantra is: Pause, Review, and then Act.
So, how do we play the long game?
I bumped my forehead on a wooden board. I jammed my brakes
full throttle. I was not driving. But my brain was racing at Mach speed. In
time, I had crossed a bend toward concussion, then I took another steep swerve
to brain haemorrhage, then another precarious turn into losing my mind, and
then becoming comatose. I screeched into the pitstop. What the devil was the
matter with me?
I declared, “Get behind me, Satan”. It reminded me of Simon Peter’s panic when
Jesus predicted that He would be killed. This event followed after Simon Peter,
inspired by the Holy Spirit and not of ‘his flesh and blood’, correctly
identified Jesus as the Messiah, the Son of the living God.” (Mt 16:16)
None of the apostles, except Thomas, could imagine or come
to terms with the notion of Jesus being killed. How can that be? He is the
Messiah, the awaited One. Cyrus the Great, the gentile ‘Messiah’, restored
Jerusalem and the Temple to the Israelites who had been taken away to Babylon.
Jesus, the Jewish Messiah, was now to do the same. Liberate Israel from Roman conquest
of their land.
Thomas had said, “Let us also go (to Jerusalem), that we
may die with him.” (Jn 11:16) He said this when Jesus disclosed, “Our
friend Lazarus has fallen asleep; but I am going there to wake him up.”
(Jn 11:11). The other disciples were fraught with fear when Jesus said, “Let
us go back to Judea”. “But Rabbi,” they
said, “a short while ago the Jews there tried to stone you, and yet you
are going back?” (Jn 11:8).
I refuelled at the pit stop. Got my bearings right. I
surrendered the event and the bump on my head to “My God and My Lord”
[Copyright St Thomas having got his doubts cleared by Jesus.] 27 Then
he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your
hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” 28 Thomas
said to him, “My Lord and my God!” (Jn 20:27-28)
The statement of relevance to us in the context we are
addressing is what followed: 29 Then
Jesus told him (Thomas), “Because you have seen me, you have
believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” (Jn
20:29). Our belief rests on our ability to surrender to Jesus. To truly
believe. What are the manifestations of truly believing? I don’t think of the
bump anymore. Neither the inflammation nor the mild uneasiness. I cast it out
of my mind. If reassurance is needed, I think of Jesus mocked in the
Praetorium:
16 The soldiers led Jesus away into
the palace (that is, the Praetorium) and called together the whole company
of soldiers. 17 They put a purple robe on him, then
twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on him. 18 And
they began to call out to him, “Hail, king of the Jews!” 19 Again
and again they struck him on the head with a staff and spat on him. Falling on
their knees, they paid homage to him. 20 And when
they had mocked him, they took off the purple robe and put his own clothes on
him. Then they led him out to crucify him. (Mk 15:16)
We need to play the long game
and declare health onto ourselves no matter what happens. For things will
happen in our lives that we don’t control. What we control is our response to
it.
We need to be particularly
careful of how we perceive what happens to us. What does a bump on our head
mean? We were not mindful of what we were going or doing, or had misjudged the
space between the wooden board and ourselves. Or have a condition that has to
be diagnosed and treated to prevent recurrence – and the courage to take it
head-on instead of procrastinating. What benefit can we derive from the
incident? Be more mindful, of course. Don’t go imagining all kinds of
consequences. Thank God for what happened (foolish to some) and make an
offering, partaking in the suffering of Jesus on Calvary and on the Cross. We
must remind ourselves that for resurrection, crucifixion must precede it. For
our ‘resurrection’, sanctification must precede it, and for sanctification, an acceptance
of suffering.
Then there are other forms of
painful moments. Soured or souring relationships with old wounds festering for
lack of treatment. What is the treatment? Forge healthy relationships no matter
what. Avoid feeling grieved and offended. Be empathetic even to one who intends
harm. Be a Teflon pan. Nothing should stick. What freedom we buy ourselves. To
stay focused on what matters. Not be tangled in messy self-talk.
Relationships sour because we
have allowed our mind to play games with us. We choose to entertain a negative
thought about the other person for the unsavoury delight it affords us. Banish
the blighted ‘entitlement’ mindset. Teachers have issues with their students
because they come with one. Relatives have problems with their own because an
unwarranted word was spoken or misinterpreted.
The damaging ones are between
spouses, between children, children and parents, and in-laws and out-laws. We
go to our graves with it.
Negative thoughts have a life of
their own. Positive thoughts have low shelf-life. Negative thoughts play on us.
They create spin and drive our self-talk. It is ceaseless, relentless, and, damagingly,
ulcer-creating, to which we can owe many of our sicknesses – especially the
chronic ones. It is stressful. Stress, we know, is a silent killer. Why in
heaven would we want to be stressed? This is who we are. No, you are not.
You aspire to good health. Knowing
that something is killing you, why would you not let go? Because we don’t want
to. It is the absurdity of our lives that we actually take delight in hating or
grievance spinning. Not the type of spinning that creates cloth, but the kind
that creates clots that block our system from working.
Our brain is a predictive
engine. It predicts our thinking and our doing before we think or do. It does
this to save energy. The brain is just 2% of body weight but consumes 20% of
the body's energy – nutrients converted to energy. There is a concept called
entropy. It is often described informally as a measure of disorder. An ordered system has low entropy, while a
system with many possible configurations has high entropy.
To play the long game, we must
work to get into a state of low entropy. We must mind our minds and stop them
from taking over our existence. We can only do that by being in an eternal
state of prayer. By declaring, “Get behind me, Satan”, when we are troubled by
unholy, mindless or detrimental thoughts – diligently eschewing stress and
recriminations – always being alive to life and to live it fully.
-
Mathew Anthony
No comments:
Post a Comment