Never asked, always given
October 11, 2026
Those of us who have been slightly short of being brilliant, i.e., did reasonably well in all other subjects but were falling short in one or two, were given grace marks and ‘pushed through’ and promoted to the next class.
That is true, or should be true, in the spiritual world. As human beings, we are fallible. King David was fallible. The account begins in 2 Samuel 11:1-2, during the springtime when kings typically went to war. However, David remained in Jerusalem while his army, led by Joab, besieged the Ammonite city of Rabbah.
One evening, David arose from his bed and walked on the roof of his palace. From there, he saw a beautiful woman bathing. Her name was Bathsheba, the wife of Uriah the Hittite, one of David’s mighty men. Wrong place. Wrong time. But grace can push us through.
Imagine we have been called to the wedding banquet by the King himself. “Then he sent some more servants and said, ‘Tell those who have been invited that I have prepared my dinner: My oxen and fattened cattle have been butchered, and everything is ready. Come to the wedding banquet.’ (Mt 22:4) Did we go for Holy Mass today? Did we attend the family rosary?
Not everyone can lay out a feast like a king or a billionaire can for their son’s wedding. We expect nothing but the best. Since the invite is from the king or the billionaire, we know we must dress our best, not to stick out in the silken crowd. Do we know what feast God has laid out for us? God, the creator of the king and the billionaire, whose do we are so keen to attend? God holds out such an invitation every day? Do we perceive it? Do we value it?
We calculate the worth of the gift we offer to the bridal couple. It should be commensurate. We cannot come through as beggars. We count the days to the event. We socialise the invitation as a badge of honour. Is being Christian a badge of honor? Do we socialize it? Do we go to God as beggars or sons and daughters of the King of kings?
In contrast, for the wedding reception of the son of the help in our home, we automatically discount the spread we can expect. Why do we do that? We know what we pay the help at home and perhaps her economic situation. We will produce excuses to wiggle out of the invite. We will even lavish a cash gift to fund part of the expenses. Assurances are given with no intention of keeping. The invitation is shoved into a corner. Out of sight. Out of mind. Is that our attitude to the Sacraments of the Catholic Church too? Do we believe the Catholic Church has nothing to offer for the status we enjoy in our society? Is the Church only for those in need?
Unknown to us, the help’s son was a brilliant engineer who worked overseas. His wedding reception had the who’s who of the tech world. The reception was in a seven-star hotel. The engineer’s father is a rickshaw puller. He and his mother saved every penny they earned for the son’s education until scholarships sped him on his way to academic success and a remunerative career overseas. He bought a house for his parents in a gated community. But they expressed their discomfort staying there on their own. Where would they park the rickshaw, their lifeblood? It would be odd to go to work in the neighbour’s house? They continued to live in the slum area where they had always lived. There they were among their own. There they had respect. Above all, they continued to do what they were doing when raising their child. In that life, grace produced fruit. The gated community was just that ‘gated’. Cut off from real life.
To them, more precious than material blessing was the mystery of the priceless grace. A gift bestowed on them by a benefactor who also gave them their loving son and now daughter-in-law. They knew grace is given, not asked for. It is not of human making. Their life was difficult. Anyone who has been on a rickshaw ride in Kolkata, pedalled by a man withered by age, the puller’s only source of income to put food on the family table, will know what that life is.
Such is the life of many in our country. Yet despite their difficulties, they are joyful. They don’t despair despite their condition. They want the opportunity to work. The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard. (Mt 20:1-16). Even if it is to pull a rickshaw or to work in a home where the owners ironically can barely afford their salary. It is an opportunity to earn by the sweat of their brow to have a shelter over their heads, clothes on their body, warm food to eat, and a place to sleep, raise children, in a loving, open, chatty community, all who are alike in joy and misery.
Despite their son’s wealth, they knew they were in the right place at the right time in the slum among brothers and sisters, not strangers. Each one knew the others’ family history. There was nothing to hide. No one was eyeing their true wealth: fraternal peace and the joy of living.
They had good health and a good spirit despite the rigour of making that small living. They had a prince of a son, who was not disturbed that his parents preferred to live where they did and did not aspire to a gilded cage. It was not a matter of shame for him. They loved him, and he loved them. He had married a sweetheart from his slum days who had the same rags-to-riches success materially, but spiritually she still cherished the friends she made in childhood who she supported with her newfound wealth.
Wealth did not change this family. They were better for it. They were humbled by their good fortune. They were grateful for the efforts of their parents and benefactors who got them there. They chose the battlefield to slumber. They did not have a concept of an off day. Every day was spent at work, with family or doing community service with the poor. To remind them where they came from and who got them where they were today. The grace of God.
What is a mystery to them and to some of us when we think about where we were and where we are today. It is the same question. Why were we chosen to be showered with this grace? Why did providence consider us to be elected for this grace? Because he called, and we answered? “For many are invited, but few are chosen.” (Mt 22:14)
- Mathew Anthony
